Don't even think about it...

Don't even think about it.


How many times have I told that to myself lately? Not just in one type of circumstance either. All types of circumstances. In one many of those 'should I or should I not', 'will I or will I not' cases. The answer is usually the same... I guess that's just how I am though. Second best (sometimes not even) in many things. Never the one. Take a backseat so someone else can go forward first. Just a shade back from being "good enough". Always telling myself to assert myself more instead of standing back. This entire time I thought I was working on that. Working on being good enough. But I guess not? At least, it doesn't feel that way. Atelophobia? You tell me. The way things are going in my eyes, it's not just atelophobia.

FFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU--.